I had been contemplating giving up alcohol for a while. I wanted to, but didn’t know how. The urge to reach for a beer after a long week at work on a Friday was irresistible. Or, let’s be honest, even on random Tuesdays and Wednesdays.

At some level, I was addicted. Not in a way I’d consider problematic—I wouldn’t get drunk every time I drank, and I was far from drinking every day. But it was every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. And sometimes earlier in the week. When written down, it was much closer to drinking every day than I initially thought.

It was never just one drink. It was always at least two. Rarely over three, but sometimes it was (and then way past being able to count how many). Whether it was two or ten, I’d always feel the downside the next day. Anything from a slightly foggy head to forcing myself to be sick in the hope it would make me feel better.

This is what Andy Ramage calls “middle lane drinking.” Not problematic per se, but definitely drinking too much. An average drinker who has a few drinks a couple of days a week and a few more once in a while. Someone unaware of how alcohol subtly affects their life.

I’ve had plenty of “I’m never drinking again” moments. It wasn’t a particular night out that broke the camel’s back. It also wasn’t a conscious decision one day to definitively stop. In November, I signed up for Ryan Parke’s Future Self Programme. It started with a 21-day challenge, in which I had to show up at 7am every morning confirming whether I’d gone to bed sober the night before. This 21-day challenge took place between 4 December and 25 December 2023. Yes, the Christmas party season.

These 21 days showed me that taking a break from alcohol combined with daily goal setting in an accountable fashion is a life-changing experience. This was different from Dry January—I wasn’t just taking a break from alcohol; I was prioritising career, lifestyle, and health-based goals alongside my abstinence. The more I reflected, the clearer it became that alcohol was detrimental to my well-being.

Once you realise you can go without alcohol during the Christmas party period, you start to question whether you need it at all. I continued to stay alcohol-free past the 21-day end date, and all the way through January. Then February. Then I thought, why not do sober spring? No drinking until the second half of 2024.

I acknowledge to myself every day that I went to bed sober last night. Sometimes this is a conscious thought, but at other times it’s indirect—you can’t help but notice waking up feeling fresh every day when previously 50% of the time you’d feel some degree of hungover.

There are still odd occasions when I crave a glass of red wine. This most often happens when I’m cooking steak at home! But besides that, it’s been pretty easy, and thankfully everyone I’ve spoken to has been incredibly receptive. In fact, there’s now a modicum of respect and appreciation for giving up. It’s not a weakness to give up booze; it’s a superpower.

I believe it’s better to focus on what you gain from giving up alcohol than what you’re missing out on. Mental clarity and stillness every single day. Never having to bail on a workout. Remembering every moment of a night out. Getting home earlier when the conversation takes a nosedive. Sleeping properly instead of passing out. I won’t claim that I never had a brilliant night out when I was drunk. But I had some absolute stinkers as well. These just rarely happen when you’re sober—because if you’re in your right mind, you just remove yourself from situations you’re not enjoying. This is nearly impossible when you’re drunk.

I’m pretty sure I won’t feel the urge to start drinking again at the end of my sober spring challenge. 25 November 2023 was the last time I had a drink. I was 40 years, 1 month, and 16 days old. Here’s to the next 40 years and beyond, alcohol-free!